In this short episode, Zoe discusses 10 of the best ways to meet new people and make new friends this. year, in a list curated by...you, the listeners!Support the show
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70% of people do not have a single person that they can call in the middle of a crisis. Let's face it, we are relationally broke. And my mission is to make that percentage zero. But how? By building relational wealth, the embodiment of all your relationships with yourself with others and experiences that enrich your life. I promise you this podcast will help you build wealth in every way that money cannot. And it all starts by being accidentally intentional. Let's begin. Hey, what's up, guys, and welcome back to another accidentally intentional podcast episode. In this little episode, I'm going to be discussing 10 awesome ways to meet and make new friends this year. And I'm pretty excited about this because a lot of you contributed ideas to this list. And let's be upfront about it. This is not a complete list. This is not an exhaustive list. It's 10 ways to jumpstart some ideas for you. But honestly, as you're thinking of them, please make the comment section if you're watching this on YouTube, ideas that have worked for you or people that you know of when it comes to making new friends and finding those environments to foster friendship as well. Now, the goal of this podcast is to build relational wealth, which equates to rich relationships. And one of the things that I found it's a through line for rich relationships is that there is some common theme that unites the friends together, whether it be something like a common goal, let's say your fitness friends, right? A common vision, a common faith, it might be, there's something that's foundationally, similar between two people in order to make their friendship, rich, because they always have something to connect about. So I want to set that as the framework for this because a lot of these ideas are ultimately to get you to find a commonality, and be the jump off point for creating those rich relationships in your life. So I'm just gonna hop right into it. The first way and idea for making and finding new friends is to join a recreational sports league now hang on before you're saying no, I'm not doing sports. I'm too competitive. Or maybe you're saying I'm not competitive at all. I have no interest in it. Listen to this. I had a co worker Tell me a couple weeks ago that she and her boyfriend just joined a recreational sports league. And I was intrigued, because this is also the same person who says I don't play sports. So I said, Okay, tell me more about what made you join a sports like she said, Oh, girl, it's cornhole? It's a it's a recreational cornhole league. And I was amazed. And I was so excited because it was like, This sounds so fun. She said, Yeah, it's the most chill thing. We decided we're joining to make friends. It ended up being a thing where everybody else joined for that same reason as well. And so we become this gang. We go out for drinks afterwards, we we hang out and go to dinner. And I was like, What a perfect introductory way for people to make new friends especially if you're in a new city. Now this particular place that facilitated the rec sports league was called Volvo sports, V o l o sports. Check that out and see if it is in a city near you. This is not sponsored or anything, I just want to put the right resources in front of you. Number two idea is trivia night. If you love trivia, only if you don't love trivia, this is gonna be uncomfortable for you. But I have lots of friends that love their friends trivia. I happen to really enjoy Disney, I would definitely go to a Disney trivia night and make some Disney loving friends at those particular nights. But it's a fun idea, because we know why everyone's there. Right? We all like at least the same thing to be at this place. So it's just a good relaxing chill environment where you at least have one starting point for a conversation. Number three, this might take a little work. But finding a niche, niche, however you pronounce it a niche event where people with similar interests as you would go to this could be for instance, something like a Comicon. Or like for me, I'd love to go to like a podcasters Expo because I'm trying to find people who have similar interests, similar passions, right? So it's a jumping off point, to start deeper conversations to start ultimately, a friendship and develop a deeper relationship. So that's number three. And if you're thinking of ideas, as I'm going through it right now, please, by all means, write them down either on your own or in the car. comments because I want this comment section filled with tons of ideas so that we're all coming together to unite over building rich relationships, especially if you're watching this, and you are finding yourself wanting to make new friends right now, or you just recently moved, it's all new to you, you got to start over, then we're here to support you. Number four. And this was mentioned in the relational health series that I did a couple months ago. And now refer to one of the videos up here. And we talked about number four. But we talked about the idea of joining a workout or fitness class of some sort. And there is something to be said, of the deep friendship that can be forged when two people are physically exerting themselves working towards a parallel goal, right? So I mean, peloton has done an incredible job with this SoulCycle, Orangetheory, all of these chains that create a community of people where they're encouraging one another, there's awesome examples. And I know a ton of friends that have made friends by going and becoming part of those fitness communities. And if even that kind of freaks you out, cuz you're like, No, if I go, people will judge me, we also talked about in one of those previous episodes that nobody's thinking about you. Because when we go to the gym, and we're self conscious, we're only thinking about ourselves and how paranoid we are. So if we're all thinking of how paranoid we are, therefore, we're not thinking about other people. So we're just encouraged and motivated to see that there's other people who have that same desire and push that we do. And my friend, Mackenzie to shared a fun trick. If you do find yourself at a workout class, and you're thinking, Okay, well, I don't really know what to say to people. Now that I'm here. She, she talked about the gum trick, where if you are a person that has gum, this I make friends, because it's just a quick, you know, after class when people are dripping with sweat, or maybe before maybe it's a nervous thing, you're like, Hey, would you like some gum too, then you start chatting, everything's good. And you make a new friend just like that, I should have put gum as number five, actually, now that I think about it. But what I have is number five, is finding something that provides a shared learning goal, an example of this Toastmasters, if you want to get into public speaking, another example, a dance class, which is where I made a ton of friends, which is where I made a ton of friends, this could be something like in art class, something where you want to learn something, because if you're with a group of people that also wants to learn something, what an easy gateway conversation in, you have, because you both already have that same curiosity. So if you're both curious about that, there's a good chance that you're gonna be curious about knowing other people and their angle and thought process on that exact same thing as well. Now, number six is one that I personally enjoy. Yes, that is because I'm an extrovert. And it depends on the place to write. But striking up a conversation, when you're in a line in the line isn't really moving. I'll give you an example. I'll give you two examples of this. Let's say that I go to a coffee shop semi regularly. And I start to kind of see the same people who do the same thing. Well, when I'm in line behind that one day, I might just randomly start chatting with them about like, Hey, you getting a little, you know, something like that you get in this today? And then it's just that and then you say, what do you do, by the way, and then boom, there's your lane, you're in on that conversation. I have also done this, because I am a fan of the Disney parks. I have made friends in line, waiting for rides, because we know that those lines can be so long, but just turn it around or just turn around the people behind you. striking up a conversation. How long have you guys here for what's been your favorite ride today? You know, just small talk. But honestly, what I found in so many conversations is that it's the art of pulling the thread. Because if somebody wants to share something, typically, if they if they want to share something, they'll start the little little bit out. It could be anything like, let's say in Disney, there's a couple that's older, and they look like they are just enjoying retirement life strike to have a conversation with them. And then they're like, oh, yeah, we used to come here with our son. You could pull a through line on used to does it not? Does he not enjoy Disney anymore? Or is he coming back to it? You can you can start variations of the conversation. It's just being mindful and looking for ways of oh, they mentioned that maybe I should engage in that. Part number seven is volunteering for something that you are passionate about. example, animal shelter. And here is a fun fact, for you. This was a survey that was done two years ago. And it said that people that volunteer six hours a month, consider themselves on average, very happy in quotes. So if you want to be happy, and make friends who are also happy, volunteering might be the best way to do that. Here's a place number eight. Now, this is for a certain demographic of people, dog park, if you have a dog, number nine, a lot of you actually said this. If faith is something that's important to you, then church or a religious institution facility can be a great way for you to forge deep friendships. If faith is something that guide your steps, there's very high chances almost with certainty and guarantee that you're going to find other people there who have that same foundation, as you. So that's a fantastic starting point for friendship right there. And I know that churches often have has a variety of names, but it can be called a connect group, young adult group, small group, some sort of group that helps foster newer connections to in turn, forge deeper relationships. And well as I like to call them rich relationships. And number 10. Is friendship finding apps. If you didn't know, this is the thing. I'm here to tell you is a thing. There are so many apps, you can Google them, where they're apps that help you find friends, bumble even has a Bumble BFF edition where it helps you find friends near you and tries to match you. With the correct people. There's also apps like friender. And there's also apps I learned called pod dates, which are animal lovers just like you. And also there is an F Leto or F Leto. I'm not sure how it's pronounced. But this app helps you find people who are really into fitness, just like you might be in the area near you. So a lot of great options there. But I'm putting this in the same category, as you know, like discord, and Twitch and things that facilitate online conversation. These are a great starting point, and should not be the ending point. Because the previous nine are all ways to drive you to in person interaction. Because ultimately, those are the most paramount and necessary for our bodies, types of relationships where we are actually in community seeing each other face to face, not digital face to digital face. So I just went through these 10 ways, right? And you might not be thinking, Alright, cool, but like, what do I do? When I get there? What do I say? Well, the first thing to do is acknowledge that you're going to feel awkward. And it's normal, it's actually 100% normal for you to feel awkward and uncomfortable. Because it's new, right? Just period point blank. And what you should also realize is every single person has felt that before. So what I would say is if this really is your goal, to make new friends and ultimately build rich relationships, then no matter what, we have to be willing to put ourselves in an uncomfortable situation, lean into the awkward oddity, which I think I just made up so that is awkward. And do it anyways. You can even make a joke about someone being like you're winging it just be like, honestly, I don't have any friends. I'm just trying to make some new friends. I need someone to introduce me to people. Or here's a good one. Let's, let's say you go to any of these that I listed above, and you just are straight up about it and say, Hey, my name is Joe. I'm new to the area. And I just saw you having conversation here conversation here. You look like you're a pro at this. So I wanted to ask, how have you made friends around here? What are some things that I can do? Because here's, here's what you're doing? You're implying you're sharing one, I'm looking for friends and to putting feelers out, that are like covert enough that you're not being like, will you be my first friend, but rather just kind of giving them the option to either be like, Oh, well, hey, I'm actually looking for new friends too. Or? Yeah, like, honestly, like, it's been really hard. I don't know what works, then you're like, Okay, well, they don't, okay. Or they might also be like, Oh my gosh, I know what that feels like. Let me introduce you to some people, and then boom, just like that. You won't know until you try which version of which version you're going to get. But something like that, where you're kind of vulnerable and open and just sharing like, hey, like, I'd love your help. is a real really good way to go because people actually really want to help. And I know that sounds so weird, right? Because you think like, I don't want to bother them. But if someone did this to you, wouldn't you be thrilled? You'd be like, Man, I'm so grateful that you had the courage to like, come up and ask me that because duh, like, I know how that feels. And I'm so glad I know. So now I can help you. Let me just speak for myself. I would love if that happens. So thinking about what you would do, if you were on the other side of it helps you remember that the majority of people really do enjoy helping others. And here is an interesting thing that I found out recently, there is a term called mere exposure effect. Here's what this means. This is our human tendency to unconsciously, like people, just because we continue to see them, and they are familiar to us. Isn't that interesting? You know that you hear it? You may think, oh, my gosh, that's true for me, you might just be thinking about people right now. But it really is a pattern in our brain that starts to happen. So I say all that to say, no matter what it is that you try on this list, or something else that you want to try in order to make friends. The principle here is don't do it once, keep showing up. Keep going after it. Because this mere exposure effect really can't happen. But it takes work just like everything else that we want. And you're worth it. So don't forget to write in the comments, ways that you have made friends, so that we can all help one another. If you enjoy this video, please feel free to subscribe. And if you're listening on a podcast, subscribe, follow and or leave a review. It really does help the podcast so much get in front of the ears of the people that need to hear it just like us because we all want to build relational wealth. That's why we're here. So let's do it. Love you guys. We'll see you next time.